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Lets have a clean joke thread. Laughter heals as they say. (NO NASTY, OBSCENE OR COVID19!)

Larrucks said:
I bought a chicken to make some sandwiches, it's no good all it does is poo everywhere
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Know a bloke who works at a turkey abattoir, just before the bird's final moment the workers are supposed to do whatever it takes to give the birds a bit of pleasure for their final request. He says he refuses their last requests often, especially when they say gobble gobble.
 
s.rigden said:
A chap bought a new Elgrand. Returned it the next dat to the dealer. What's the problem? Well he said, it goes great in daytime mode but it wint budge when I select "night drive" !
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..and goes backwards when you select "race" mode :)
 
I accidentally swallowed some Scrabble tiles last night and now I’m experiencing constant vowel movement! The next trip to the bathroom could spell disaster!
 
s.rigden said:
A chap bought a new Elgrand. Returned it the next dat to the dealer. What's the problem? Well he said, it goes great in daytime mode but it wint budge when I select "night drive" !
Click to expand...

Same problem with other cars...

 
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