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WHAT THE FUCK???!!!!

Being told to slow down on the drinking .... I'm a grown fucking man who loves a beer and enjoys being pissed..fuck off and do some knitting or something...


Absolutely!!!

Just read this:

peter strokosz
Well-Known Member
Male, 50, from hants/berks
Almost shat myself... after de catting and oil and filter change thought I'd open daisy up..she is a wolf in sheeps clothing


Tell us more.................. and why the hell have you called your Elgrand Daisy.........it should be called Brutus.......or Fuckpig.

Have another beer and get back to me.

It's very important.

:cool::cool::cool:
 
All of our cars have been given girls names.. by the kids normally... my father had Betsy for years...cant give a car a male name just wrong..
 
very strange

The reason for the Betsy name is from 1945's after the 2nd world war they decided
due to the fact that the women had been so hard working back at home that they would
name their cars after a women being that the car's tanks and vehicles had gone though
so much shit in combat.
The most common name at the time was BETSY so most older people named their car after
that.
Pilots also called their planes Betsy too as they used Rolls Royce engines and the inventor of that engine
had a wife called betty, she used to work on the production lines and still has a solid silver flying lady
in the main foyer of the Rolls Royce building and even has that name engraved under it.
Steve Mcqueen also had various bikes and cars and all but one was called betsy, he had fleets
of cars, often work horse vehicles to ferry him about from racing events in between filming,
one was a 1964 Camero in deep red with a double overhead inlet modified to take in 458 cubic
inches of air at 5000rpm through the convexed inlet cones and it is at this point I would like to say I haven't got a fucking clue what I'm talking about and this is all totally made up.
 
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My dad told me Betsy was the first woman he ever danced with.. dad couldn't dance and stood on her feet a lot... that was the end of that.. I think my dad got his diving licence by driving a tank 20 yards in the war ..
 
My dad told me Betsy was the first woman he ever danced with.. dad couldn't dance and stood on her feet a lot... that was the end of that.. I think my dad got his diving licence by driving a tank 20 yards in the war ..

My grandad was the same I think :joy:
 
Had a man flu since last Tuesday which has been whooping my ass. Had to take half the day off on Friday as I was scared to break something that's worth 4x as much as my bike. (As everything in my warehouse is). Throat still absolutely kills, not coughing up blood anymore though which is a plus.
 
Had a man flu since last Tuesday which has been whooping my ass. Had to take half the day off on Friday as I was scared to break something that's worth 4x as much as my bike. (As everything in my warehouse is). Throat still absolutely kills, not coughing up blood anymore though which is a plus.

Glad the sense of humour is ok-ish ... get well soon. ;)
 
Had a man flu since last Tuesday which has been whooping my ass. Had to take half the day off on Friday as I was scared to break something that's worth 4x as much as my bike. (As everything in my warehouse is). Throat still absolutely kills, not coughing up blood anymore though which is a plus.

Had it for nearly 3 weeks! Cold /flu normally doesn't bother me but this one hit me hard! Couldn't take time off work either as Mrs was on grievance leave
 
I was just about to go to bed when I heard the wood on my gate creaking. Not loudly, very carefully and quietly. Thinking someone was trying to quietly make off with my my motorcycle (that is locked up like Fort Knox) around the 90 degree bend no wider than the bike itself, I grabbed my phone ready to make a 999 call and a torch. I shined the torch out the window and what was the culprit? A fucking cat.

This little furry gray bastard was entering my dog's yard via jumping on top of the fence, walking across the gate and then jumping in to the garden. Fearless little shit.


... and then it tried to steal my motorcycle.
 
Displayed my wife's valid EU Disability badge very clearly and still the arseh*le traffic warden gives me a F**king ticket! :mad:
 
Oh, and where I work, there are approx 40-50 office staff. There is ONE "throne" in the mens toilet.

It's ALWAYS engaged! Fuck sake. My bowels need to empty themselves, and I can never fucking go because some other fucker is always using it.
a lot of ours have the seat broken off , and we had one stand up for all the staff as the others were busted .
 
My house is on a security gated development and for the last few days the electric gates have been playing up, so why is it every bleedin resident knocks on my door when they can't get them to open, I can only assume it's because I'm the one that gives the gates the biggest fukin kick.
 
Anyone want a pear tree? I don't want it, my neighbours really don't want it.

Its "fruit" are such a size, when combined with its height, I reckon they could kill someone. Only hope is that one will land on the fecking fox.

Cut it down? Can't do that. Its a tree and its old = preservation order.

Yes, trees are good, I get that. This one isn't. A bit like bees, of course they are "good". Except some aren't... tree bees, not that in my experience the little barstards ever even entertain the idea of nesting in somewhere as sensible as something like a "tree". But of course you can't hurt them, they are bees, got to be good!
 
Anyone want a pear tree? I don't want it, my neighbours really don't want it.

Its "fruit" are such a size, when combined with its height, I reckon they could kill someone. Only hope is that one will land on the fecking fox.

Cut it down? Can't do that. Its a tree and its old = preservation order.

Yes, trees are good, I get that. This one isn't. A bit like bees, of course they are "good". Except some aren't... tree bees, not that in my experience the little barstards ever even entertain the idea of nesting in somewhere as sensible as something like a "tree". But of course you can't hurt them, they are bees, got to be good!

Do the pears taste good?
They make a good smoothie... but your hatred of the tree might affect the taste. How about home brew perry?
 
My house is on a security gated development and for the last few days the electric gates have been playing up, so why is it every bleedin resident knocks on my door when they can't get them to open, I can only assume it's because I'm the one that gives the gates the biggest fukin kick.

Similar problem with boaters and lock gates, just coz I live in a lock house doesn’t mean I know how it remove logs stuck under the gates stopping them closing & ruining your holiday/ weekend.
 
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