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Lets have a clean joke thread. Laughter heals as they say. (NO NASTY, OBSCENE OR COVID19!)

APARTMENT for RENT...
So a businessman met a beautiful girl and agreed to spend the night with her for £500. They did their thing, and before he left, he told her that he did
not have any cash with him, but he would have his secretary write a cheque and mail it to her. Referred to
the payment as 'RENT FOR APT.'
On the way to the office, he regretted what he had done, realizing that the whole event had not been worth the price. So he had his secretary send a cheque for £250 and enclosed the following typed note:
'Dear Madam:
Enclosed find a cheque for £250 for rent of your apartment...I am not sending the amount agreed upon
because when I rented the place, I was under the Impression that:
#1 - it had never been occupied;
#2 - there was plenty of heat and
#3 - it was small enough to make me feel cozy and at home.
However, I found out that:
#1 - it had been previously occupied,
#2 - there wasn't any heat and
#3 - it was entirely too large.'
Upon receipt of the note, the girl immediately
returned the cheque for £
£250 with the following note:
'Dear Sir:
#1 - I cannot understand how you could expect a beautiful apartment to remain unoccupied indefinitely.
#2 - As for the heat, there is plenty of it, if you know how to turn it on.
#3 - Regarding the space, the apt is indeed of regular size, but if you don't have enough furniture to fill it, please do not blame the management. Therefore, please send the rent in full or we will be forced to contact your present landlady! 🤔🤣😂🤣😂
 
A horse walks into a bar and orders a beer. Sure, the barman says, but why the long face?
 
I think that this one is good for Saturday morning:

Do you know how to keep your dream alive?...........Hit the damn snooze button 👍 😂
 
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