• Welcome to the ElgrandOC forum.

    You will find that the majority of the forum is locked, but do not worry. You can unlock more content by registering to the forum completely free. Sign up is automatic, does not require email confirmation and is instant. Feel free to browse through the sections to see what topics have been covered before you register.
    You can register for an account by CLICKING HERE

    Once you have registered, you will unlock more of the forum content. You will not unlock all of the content until you have reached 10 posts. This is to give you an opportunity to chat to existing members and help to integrate you into the forum community.
    We are a friendly and helpful community and there is a wealth of infomation contained within the forum. Please feel free to register, introduce yourself and get to know your fellow members.

    Feel free to look at the Frequently Asked Questions section, the Meets/Events section and the Competition Section without having to register.
    We look forward to getting to know you and help you with any questions or problemd you have with your Elgrand.

WHAT THE FUCK???!!!!

Why the fuck cant people use indicators when turning,no just break cant be arsed its to much fucking hassle..
And while im at it some fucking cockwomble thought it would be ok to do 40 ish on a 30 main road because he was late for work,only to wind his fucking window down to ask me what my fucking probblem was?
Now bare in mind im fucking wound up,and ive got my dissabled son in the car to take him to school,i decided to play this 1 cool,first off i told him that the speed he was doing 40+ on a 30 mph was dangerous due to the congestion and secondly he was not only cought on the speed cameras but was also video'd on my own dash camera,so he starts giving it the verbal and i told him to take his pantys out of the crack of his arse,BUT then i hear a siren only 3 cars behind me,yes an umarked car and he gets pulled over. Hope he had a very nice day!!

On a similar vein can I hereby apologise to the car I didn’t see, masked in the shadow of a following truck did see, that I pulled out of a side road in front of on the a19?

Thank dog I chose a 240bhp 4wd VDC van not a diesel or we’d all be on the way to the body shop. Just 3 sets of clean underpants required :joy:
 
Women... 'nuff said (or should that be 'muff said? :joy: )
 
On a similar vein can I hereby apologise to the car I didn’t see, masked in the shadow of a following truck did see, that I pulled out of a side road in front of on the a19?

Thank dog I chose a 240bhp 4wd VDC van not a diesel or we’d all be on the way to the body shop. Just 3 sets of clean underpants required :joy:


wreckless bastard.
On a similar vein can I hereby apologise to the car I didn’t see, masked in the shadow of a following truck did see, that I pulled out of a side road in front of on the a19?

Thank dog I chose a 240bhp 4wd VDC van not a diesel or we’d all be on the way to the body shop. Just 3 sets of clean underpants required :joy:


All been there lol
 
And now a good kind of "What the fuck" - Showsec have finally processed and updated my status to SIA (Security Industry Authority) so I can now start working as a Door Supervisor / leader within the Pit barrier crew. Get in! What the fuck though, only took them two weeks to process a photo of my license that I sent them, check my background then finally give me the go ahead but now I get paid more, get more work available and can continue working up! Finally got my second job sorted so I can fix my bus! :D
 
He found the Flux Capacitor switch but the speed camera still caught him?

I wasn't speeding......this time.... or drinking....or even stealing..... :(
 
I received this strange envelope this morning, inside was a cardboard thingy with like four window flaps, looked like a four day advent calendar and also a row of four cardboard spatchelers, what's that shit all about.
 
Riding my motorcycle back home I'm stuck behind a tractor on a winding road. A car comes up behind me and honks a police bullhorn (clearly not a police car, it's a fucking Kia Picanto) and flashes the lights at me. For about 500 yards round two corners. Where it opens up I twist the throttle and fly the middle finger at the driver as I leave him for dust. Why do people do that? All my lights work, they're bright enough I can see them on a lightless road on the ground, I hadn't left my indicator on and there's nothing hanging off my bike (this time). Assholes man.
 
Riding my motorcycle back home I'm stuck behind a tractor on a winding road. A car comes up behind me and honks a police bullhorn (clearly not a police car, it's a fucking Kia Picanto) and flashes the lights at me. For about 500 yards round two corners. Where it opens up I twist the throttle and fly the middle finger at the driver as I leave him for dust. Why do people do that? All my lights work, they're bright enough I can see them on a lightless road on the ground, I hadn't left my indicator on and there's nothing hanging off my bike (this time). Assholes man.


Because some people bro are born wankers.
It's on a DNA level, they are very special kind of prick and most never live past 40 anyway.

Don't let wankers piss you on on a bike mate, it's easy to want to rip off then have an accident.
 
Why do we still have this changing the clocks bolleaux? So instead of being wide awake at 4:30 wondering whether to get up and try and do something constructive on the pc or lie in bed on my phone, it's actually 3:30 and I've another hour to kill.
It's bad timing actually, coming back from Japan my body still thinks it's just after midday today and wants to be awake. Thankfully I'm not hungry too.

I hate not being able to sleep!
 
Fuck it, my phones nearly out of charge so I'm getting up to watch youtube. :mad:

This happens to a lot of people :joy: What did people do when they couldn't sleep before YouTube? There's only so many times you can knock one off before it starts bleeding :joy: :joy: :joy:
 
What the fuck is happening to our health fucking service??? If I hear the word “ funding” again I’m gonna stab some fucker in th eye.. all I want is my 91 year old dad out of pain and out of danger and they can’t fucking manage that because none of them are singing from the same hymn sheet..quick enough to kick him out of hospital yeah all the help is in place to help you care for him at home.. yeah my hairy love plumbs is it...
 
Just goes to say it’s the squeaky wheel that gets the oil... Papa now will be getting a live in Carer to keep him safe and pain free...
 
Just goes to say it’s the squeaky wheel that gets the oil... Papa now will be getting a live in Carer to keep him safe and pain free...

Great news. Thankfully my mum is in a great care home she can afford thanks (in part) to private health insurance that she could also afford. Dog help the rest of us that can’t afford to take that gamble.
 
Last edited:
You can’t explain how happy the whole family is with this result.. it took all of us fighting his cause for this to happen... this should had been in place before his discharge from hospital ..
 
Because some people bro are born wankers.
It's on a DNA level, they are very special kind of prick and most never live past 40 anyway.

Don't let wankers piss you on on a bike mate, it's easy to want to rip off then have an accident.
Don't ride a bike when you pissed, on drugs or angry! And by the way it is the sole intention of every other road user to kill you. Live long and prosper!
 
Fuck fit coming up
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK
10 FUCKING CUP HOLDERS AND I SPILL MY FUCKING LAMB AND LENTIL SOUP SQUARE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FUCKING DASHBOARD.
WHAT A TWAT.
 
Back
Top